States of Happiness and Insights VS Golden Cage
In the last post, I wrote about an ordinary seemingly bike ride. But at such moments, states are caught. Automatically. And effortlessly. Well, not counting the force spent on pedaling. In fact, a state of happiness is caught, or rather a certain mood that can be attributed to happy moments. As you know, there are no happy years, there are only happy days, diluted with various difficulties. Therefore, such moments are quite valuable, since they cannot be permanent and occupy 100% of the whole life..
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States of happiness
How are states caught? You can catch them while traveling, you can catch them by accident, as in the case of my bike ride, you can look at a child and be moved by his actions, you can help someone, participate in charity ... And things are actually bought in order to become a little happier. Just do not convince me that the whole world is pragmatists and the majority buys something for themselves just for the sake of functionality. There are only a few of them. But let's not talk about «correctness» way, we are all consumers in the long run. Someone is very selective, someone accepts any means of catching a state of happiness. That is to say, who is closer to what. The main thing is to be able to relax at a certain moment and turn your gaze inward, because we do not always know how to keep track of our emotions, so we may not even understand what we really feel.
Why are states needed? Hmm, in general, everything is a state. And any person in one way or another strives for happiness in his understanding. Usually for this, life is lived. First of all, the state of happiness gives inspiration, fills with strength, brings ideas. Makes you continue to live. The less happiness in a person's life (and by happiness I mean general satisfaction), the lower the quality of life, and the more likely a particular person is from their present path. True, there is Buddhism with its improvement in the skill of being happy no matter what living conditions, and indeed with a departure from positive-negative emotions to neutrality and liberation. But again, now is not about that.
It may be easier for someone to get something like this with a pill or a bottle of wine, but personally such methods are not close to me. Therefore, one has to observe oneself and, if possible, do what fills, and not what empties. Well, so that at least sometimes there were these happiest minutes-hours. Psychologists also advise everyone to have something fulfilling, for example, a hobby, a favorite job, an activity for self-realization..
Sudden insights
And also states of happiness can alternate with sudden second insights, when an understanding of something (for example, oneself) comes, insight. Although it happens without insight, but just a certain goodness comes and suddenly becomes good and comfortable, but the most important thing is clear. It is clear that you are going where you need to, that is, something resembling an insight, but not quite. I love these moments, they come in the most ordinary places, but you always need something to activate this coming. Sometimes it’s the wind, sometimes it’s a smell, maybe it’s music, or even a sensation at your fingertips from touching some surface. Wikipedia says these are memories.
I remember in China in the rehabilitation center there was a corridor that led from our building to the medical one. The usual one, representing a street path with a roof above it. Only this corridor was magical, it was blown by a special wind. Every time I drove Yegor to class, somewhere in the middle a wave of warm air rolled over and activated the moment. These are literally seconds, but such as in the Matrix, when everything freezes and you look at everything around you from the outside. It is rather difficult to describe the feelings inside, only one word is suitable for them - harmony. Here, and a certain joy that it is summer now, and pleasant nostalgia for all kinds of Thailand, and the feeling of closeness of nature, and the very understanding that everything is going as it should be. No, it's hard to describe, it turns out clumsy.
Also, my activation sometimes happens in the car ... You drive around Moscow, for example, you take Yegor to the doctor, and bam, insight for a couple of seconds, although nothing at all foreshadowed the usual load of problems in my head. Of course, taxiing in itself is conducive to various philosophical thoughts and reflections, but this is different. It only leaves very quickly. Trying to hold it back, clinging to the sensation, «chewing» it, but it still flows away like water through your fingers, leaving behind only a kind of aftertaste or memory from a sensation, which is just as quickly forgotten.
Golden cage or states
The question arises, why am I, in fact, opposed at all. After all, you can do everything, and a career with a startup, and ride a bike in the evenings. Everything is correct. But the more important question is, what is paramount? Didn't you think why children are so carefree and happy, and how then, in adulthood, is it hard to rejoice at something ordinary, simple? Isn't there a substitution of concepts that, they say, first make money, and then be happy? Then pursue your dreams, then devote time to hobbies, then look for yourself, then be realized. As if the reason for happiness, satisfaction with life, and indeed the whole meaning of life, is precisely in money and in the acceptance of you by the majority.
Maybe everything should be the other way around? First, you fill your life with deeds to which your soul lies, and then you think how, while staying on the same path (that is, not changing yourself), do everything else: make money, start a family, etc..
Honestly, I do not know the answers to all these questions, so, thinking out loud. I noticed that while I had too much in my life that «should» and «accepted» (must work in an office and earn no matter what, live in Moscow and have 2 days off on strictly defined days, eat meat and dream of a new apartment / car), then it all looked like a golden cage. Everything seems to be fine, well fed, shod, repairs made in the apartment, bought a car on credit, live and be happy. The path has been trodden before you by millions, life is planned to the end, there is nothing to worry about, stability! But no, some kind of surrogate life that takes strength. On weekends, I remember, there was no moral strength to force myself to ride the same bike, on holidays I didn't have the strength to plan a small trip and it was easier to stay at home watching TV. The spark and enthusiasm of life was lost. Rare moments of happiness (that is, constant dissatisfaction) and lack of insight. Note, I did not know anything about the alternative then, that is, I could not set myself up negatively in advance, I just watched from the side and wondered what was wrong with me.
P.S. True, there are a bunch of reverse examples ... But perhaps there is someone among my readers who understands what I am talking about and is familiar with a similar situation. It would be interesting to know your experience, how you combined hobbies and work, whether or not you sagged under the circumstances and opinion of the majority, whether you were looking for your own path and whether you followed it without retreating no matter what.