Downshifting is not for everyone and along the way is not for us

Somehow they discussed in the comments on one of the blogs why people are periodically disappointed in Thailand, travel, downshifting and others «Oh», why life returns to its former course and only a few remain to do what they started. You don't have to go far, you can look at various bloggers, and, unfortunately, we too. And I remember how great everything is began and even one time continued...

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Downshifting is not for everyone

Obviously, people are different and their interests are also different. Therefore, it is not surprising that downshifting / traveling / wintering / emigration is not suitable for everyone. However, in recent years it is just a trend of some kind, fashion. Moreover, I have a feeling that often the usual way of life changes unconsciously and only under the influence of the media, friends and acquaintances. The simplest example, a person sees a paradise picture, as someone lives in Thailand among the tropics, eats fruit in winter, sunbathes, bathes, of course, you also want to. But few are clear on what really lies behind this tip of the iceberg. Starting from what is eternal «vacationer» in fact, she works hard from morning to evening, but she posts only rare moments of her vacation on the network, ending up with the fact that the weather turns out to be too hot, the sea is too wet, and the local population is too different from you. There is no heaven on earth, there is only a ratio of pros and cons, and what suits one does not suit the other at all. There is nothing and no one who will solve your problems, except yourself, you should not run from yourself.

Downshifting, an example of a beautiful picture

I remember that in the early years of blogging, they constantly tried to convict me of lying to myself. After all, it is more comfortable when there are a lot of things, when more money is spent, when there is a career and stability. It is difficult for people to understand how another person can be comfortable, for example, in minimalism, if they themselves are not comfortable in the same conditions, do not believe, they mock. To which I always replied, which person will make themselves worse? If he chose to live in a certain way, downshift, not build a career, live in another city / country, then, probably, it is better for him specifically. And, if he lives like this, then probably for a reason. Not everyone can (and want) to rivet startups one by one and devote their lives to the generally accepted.

And in general, it's not just about money. Sometimes, to change life / geographic location / citizenship, you need to go through a lot of stages. Without enthusiasm and a clear understanding of why you need it, it is unlikely that something will work out. You cannot see only the pluses, a beautiful picture and go to the ball, you need to look at what the iceberg is hiding under the water, weigh your strength, otherwise you will be blown away by the first serious obstacle. Although, of course, it is also necessary to try, without this there is no way.

Give comfort!

It is easiest to show the changes using the example of wintering. Our last trip to Thailand for six months turned out to be quite expensive, especially when compared to how we went the very first time, when it took us about 180 thousand rubles for six months together with flights, Imagine! And the last time I won't even say how much :) No, we did not live like kings, but, so to speak, we chose comfort. For example, they stayed in more expensive hotels, they also chose an apartment and a house not in the lower price range, rented a car instead of a bike..

Yes, we had good reasons - we were very tired of all our vicissitudes: Yegor's bad sleep and the fact that he cannot walk, constant activities with him and a rather difficult life. All this takes time and energy. I will never forget how we departed for 4 days in Bangkok after the flight, we just sat in the hotel and rocked, rocked Yegor. In general, saving has ceased to turn out the way it used to be, sometimes I am ready to give all the money just to sleep or rest a little. Actually, that's why a nanny came to us in Moscow at one time.

Goodbye my beloved downshifting?

However, if we step back from our problems and the dollar exchange rate, which doubled in price, it became obvious that in our family, first of all, the reason is that opinions were divided and the same «downshifting is not for everyone». I don’t know if children have such an influence (as catalysts accelerate understanding of oneself), or the worldview of any person irreversibly changes during life. Maybe Daria herself will write a post about this someday, but for now I will tell.

Probably someone noticed that I began to write much less personal on the blog, and the enthusiasm disappeared. This is due precisely to our disagreements, since if you write philosophical posts, talk about aspirations, plans, then they will only concern me alone, which is somehow silly. Downshifting, travel, emigration, freelancing - all this remains only for me.

Downshifting is needed only for me

We talked a lot with Daria and realized that it is easier for her to live in Moscow, in a world she understands, in her usual comfort zone and with a minimum of new and alien, to go to work, etc. And, it is desirable that the standard of living was as high as possible (higher than what we have). There is some difficulty with the latter, since my personal minimum standard of living has long been passed, and its minimum level corresponds to my peak earnings. That is, I have been living comfortably for a long time, but she just came close to her minimum, she got it :)

So, what a downshifting for her if the bottom rung of Maslow's pyramid still hasn't been passed. There is emigration to the garden, because it is almost always associated with a zeroing and deterioration of the standard of living for a certain period, not to mention the fact that there will be a lot of difficulties and questions that must be resolved with enthusiasm. And if a person himself was not determined to emigrate, then why would he need extra difficulties in life. Let the one who drags from his familiar place and burns with moving do everything, it is quite logical. For a long time Daria could not admit this to herself, since she lived in a world of her own illusions (see the first paragraphs of this post). I figured out for myself that travel / downshifting is cool and the only right thing, and I suffered from it. It's a terrible thing when you don't know your true aspirations. Let me remind you that we just met once against the background of a passion for downshifting, eco-settlements, freelancing, moving from Moscow to hell.

Money is everything

I wonder why everything in this world always rests on money? If my income was 10 times higher, I would be able to provide my wife with the necessary standard of living, and to realize my aspirations, I would not have to choose. Likewise, it would be easy to travel / emigrate to any country without any zeroing there, if you only know to pay for everything, because even citizenship is bought. Well, who would refuse to move without effort «furniture» and live a couple of years in some Spain in your own villa on the seashore? :) And if there is no rehabilitation next to this villa, then it would be possible to open your own rehabilitation center ...

P.S. How to find a compromise is not clear. Probably, if I could make millions and solve everything with money, then I would have done it already, but for now I have to continue looking for options.

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